Geeks Grow Old Too

I was looking in the mirror on Monday last week, and noticed something hilariously awful: the front of my hairline is thinning. Yep, that’s right folks, I’m losing my hair. It’s been slow going, and I’ve lost it in bits and pieces since I turned 24, but this year it got thinner a little faster than the previous years.

Protip: if you’re losing your hair, the shorter the cut the better. So I went to see my lovely hairdresser, and had her cut my hair super short. Luckily, I don’t need to shave my head down yet, I still look good with hair. For now.

So why am I bringing this up? Why am I mentioning that I’m losing my hair? Well geeks, I reveal this for one reason. As it turns out, I’m getting older.

Birthdays!

On the 16th of January, I turned 28 years old. And I felt spectacular. In fact, thanks to all the changes I’ve gone through over the last 10 years, it seems like every time my birthday comes around, I am extremely proud of my age, and the accomplishments I’ve achieved thus far.

People are always worried about growing old. I’m sure as hell not. My hairdresser mentioned special hair products, and Rogaine, to save my hair. FUCK THAT! I felt absolutely no shame at losing it. It just means I’m reaching a new stage in my life. Oh, and it killed my dreams of ever looking like my salt and pepper idol George Clooney. I’m going to have to aim for the Jason Statham look instead. Better start working on those abs!

Look Geeks, we don’t really have a choice: we’re getting older. It’s happening, right now, to you and me and everyone else. The key is to do it like a boss. Accept that you can’t do certain things you used to do when you were younger, like wear a Yoda backpack, or eat three boxes of cookies in a row and still feel good. Instead embrace the tons of new things you have access to.

Am I going to quit playing videogames? Throw away my MagicTheGathering cards? Stop watching Kung Fu movies? Fuck NO! All of those things are in my “cool geekery” category, and they are staying with me as long as I have time for them.

Am I going to continue to meet new women and have sex with them? Go to the gym and stay in shape? Eat healthy and occasionally binge on junk food? Throw crazy awesome parties where people literally collapse from fun (and sometimes exhaustion)? Fuck YES!

The key is to keep enjoying life, but update a few things. Maybe buy nicer clothes, get in shape, or go on an adventure.

Nostalgia

Sure, sometimes we all look back and wish for our childhoods, that safe haven where nothing else mattered besides beating the final castle in Zelda II. But much as I love to reminisce, I know something  quite spectacular which makes growing older so groovy. My childhood? My teens? My early twenties? Not even half as good as my life right now.

Don’t believe me? Check out this nifty chart I created outlining some important aspects of my life. Click for full size.

Note that videogames remain a constant in this chart over the years, and have no concrete effect on me in any other category. It seems, however, that my hair loss and increase in sex sauce are directly in opposition to each other. Coincidence? I think not. If my calculations are correct, by 2015 I should be completely bald, and getting tons of sex. And probably looking exactly like Jason Statham, but better in every way because I’ll also be the national Tekken champ.

So there you have it folks, growing old is not so bad. I’m sure you can think of many reasons why your life is better now than it was when you were younger. Leave a comment and tell me all about it!