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Porn is eating your brain

It’s been a long day. You just got home from work. You’re tired, feeling lazy, and maybe a little horny too. The computer beckons. You turn it on, wondering what kind of new and excellent porn video you’re going to find, one that’ll hit the spot just right. Two hours and countless clips later, you’re done. Not horny anymore, but you didn’t fuck anyone either. Welcome to porn: it sucks (metaphorically).

It’s like a drug or something

An internet porn addiction is when the thought of your computer turns you on.
Gutsygeek

So many guys I know watch a lot of porn. Like, two hours a day. Of other people fucking. Think about how messed up that is: rather than getting out there, trying to meet a girl of their own that they can have the good sex with, they watch other people do it on a computer screen. It’s a very odd concept, when you break it down like that.

Now, porn isn’t a horrible thing. When you’re sick at home, and you don’t have the option of getting sex, porn is a viable alternative. Also, if you limit your porn watching to once a week, your brain won’t get taken over by the pornographic demons.

But if you’re a normal, average human, and you watch porn 1-2 hours a day, you’ve got a problem. That’s 7-14 hours of your life, every single week. Think about how much you could accomplish if you used a fraction of that time on something like fitness, learning, or working on a personal project.

Sure, there are some benefits to porn, like learning new positions, or identifying body parts if you’re a virgin. Even watching it with a partner is fun, because it gets you both in the mood.

Unfortunately, there are lots of detrimental things you’ll pick up too. Not every girl wants to get DPed and bukkake’d within ten minutes of meeting. Save that stuff for the fifth date.

Ok, but I like watching porn

Me too man, me too. But it had a negative effect on my brain in lots of ways.

First, I began to make a habit of checking out porn sites as soon as I got on my computer. Like all routines, when you do it enough times, you reinforce the bad habit. It doesn’t help that this particular habit is damn fun.

Second, I was slowly getting desensitized to what I was seeing. Watching ordinary sex was no longer stimulating enough. I needed more positions, more spanking, more leather, more etc. When you need to see three midgets licking nutella off of a tranny hooker that’s getting it on with a goat, just to get turned on, maybe you need to take a break.

Third, I developed all kinds of weird complexes about my body. I couldn’t have sex 3 times in quick succession and I didn’t have a 10-inch dong. Was I normal? Um, yea. Pornstars, like athletes, get hired because they have specific skills. They can get erections on command in front of tons of people, last forever, orgasm multiple times, and have large penises. Most of us are two out of four on these things.

Funny story: a couple of years ago, I was sick at home with the flu. My girlfriend at the time came over with soup (bless her sexy soul), and decided to get some work done on my computer while I shivered in bed. After about an hour of working, she suddenly looked at me with a mischievous grin and asked:

“Hey, where’s your porn? I wanna see what kind of freaky shit you watch.”

“Um, on my desktop, in the folder called ‘Porn'”, I replied.

“No way! I would’ve seen it before. Lemme check i… oh my god there it is! You just leave it in plain sight?”

“Well, I work on a Mac. Anyone can just type in a keyword in Finder and find my porn, so might as well make it easier for me to access.”

We both had a good laugh about that.

porn

So what’s your point?

I’m a lucky man. When I got into my first real relationship, I no longer had the urge to watch porn. In fact, it seemed like a waste of time. I had it in case I was away from my girl for a long period of time.

It’s a weird cycle: when I have a girl, I don’t watch porn. When I don’t have a girl, I watch porn, which makes me less driven to meet a girl, which leads to more porn. Ouch.

Now here’s the experiment: when I don’t have a girl, and don’t watch porn, what happens? In my experience, I usually quadruple the effort I put into meeting girls, and end up getting laid. I want you to try it.

So, I’m issuing the porn challenge to all my friends out there: no porn watching, as of right now. No nudie pics, no half-naked online profiles, no tube sites, no downloads, no magazines, no erotica.

If you really want to get yourself off, you’ll have to use your imagination. I want to see how long you’ll survive without the online stimulation.

The best way I’ve found is to actually meet women, so if you want a play-by-play on how to get a girlfriend, check out The Geek’s Guide to Getting the Girl.

25 comments add your comment

  1. i never watch porn… but after reading this entry, i am totally intrigued (i know that wasn’t the take-home message).
    rami, you may have created a monster.

    • You know what this is like? This is like when people watch “Don’t Do Drugs!” public service announcements, then have a sudden urge to go roll a joint.

      In all seriousness though, go watch some. You’ll understand what the fuss is all about. Just make sure it’s not more than once a week 😀

    • Hahah, oh no, you too?! Crap, I should really put a sign in front of the article:
      “WARNING! MAY CAUSE YOU TO WATCH PORN IF YOU’VE NEVER DONE SO BEFORE!”

  2. I have to say that there is another important angle to consider here. You make some good points, but porn can be useful in maintaining quality of the girls you end up sleeping with. If you rub one out before you go out for an evening’s drinking you are much less likely to think “fuck it, I’ll go home with her” at the end of the night. If you have been abstaining, as you suggest, you end up being a charged-up hornball and are willing to lower your standards. This can put you in some difficult situations the next morning.

    • True, but then there’s also the fact that if you rub one out, there’s a good chance you won’t go out. There’s also the chance that you go out, and don’t bother making any effort to meet a girl because you’ve taken care of business 😀

    • I guess it depends a lot on the individual. Like anything, porn should be used strategically. The issue here is more when it becomes an over-used habit. I see pot in a similar way. Once and a while it can be an incredibly useful perception-shifter and humility causing catalyst. But allow it to get into the every day routine and you’re a zombie (and even less to go out than even porn will make you).

  3. Porn is a complete waste of time and I’ve noticed in many cases, porn watches prefer their porn over their women. It was the last straw for me, when I was with my girl and I couldn’t get it up but when I watched porn, I had no problem!

  4. In my experience, Porn is NOT healthy. Semen is very important to the body, full of useful nutrients. Ever wondered how it would feel keeping it inside?

    You will become smarter, stronger, wittier, less anxious, more happy, feeling more pleasure from life, more confident, have better skin, less acne and some other benefits.

    Abstaining from porn and masturbation has been one of the best decisions of my life.

    • I totally agree with this!

      Although, I’ve been doing NoFap for well over 180 days now, about 5 relapses, and I’ve got to say my mood has never been shittier.

      Just absolute crap.

      So idk if it’s been worth it.. I did notice that people in general seem to leave me alone and seem to respect me more for some reason. What ever though.

    • Hahahah oh man, are you having sex? Because the point of this article isn’t to stop masturbating or having sex, it’s to stop watching porn. You can totally masturbate to whatever’s going on in your head.

      And honestly, if you’re not letting it out regularly, I fear you may go insane.

    • What the actual fuck? Semen has nothing to do with dopamine in your brain and the serotonin that regulates it. Go ahead and keep telling yourself that if you want to believe in non-sense. Oh and if you masturbate you go blind because semen contains a miracle that somehow regulates your vision, if you masturbate your vision will go and you’ll have to wear glasses. I can’t tell if you are just naive or trying to be funny.

  5. What is your advice for an over-the-hill senior? I still love women immensely, love looking at young women, but am too old to get it up any more! I won’t risk my heart with Viagra, but Oh God I do love admiring online ladies, and that’s with or without actual sex on screen. It’s a cheap pleasure. And, if I am lucky, once a month I get to fire the canon. Dating 70 year old gals ain’t gonna give me no relief in my state. Comprenez-vous? jep

    • Ha! Good point my man. Honestly, at your age just do whatever the fuck you want. No one’s going to tell you not to watch porn, especially not me 🙂

      Je comprends mon ami!

  6. GutsyGeek,

    I have attempted two fairly long abstinence periods from porn; 55 days and 38 days. On the 55 day streak, I was having sex regularly up to 5+ times a week.. I am a college athlete who runs, eats well, and lifts weights daily so it is safe to say that my libido is sky-high. That streak only ended because I jumped into a relationship with a woman who wanted to wait until marriage to have sex and like you said, suddenly not having a release drove me crazy! For the 38 day streak, my sex-life was not near as prevalent so after a little over five weeks, I relapsed. Both of these streaks being with me abstaining from BOTH porn and masturbation. I love this article! I have read it well over 20 times, it is like a movie that gets straight to the action and tells you everything that you need to know! I do want to ask, is it okay to masturbate let’s say.. 10-14 days after not getting real sex? I am going to eliminate porn entirely, but I find it impossible as a male human being to hold it all in for weeks at a time with no release. Also, I feel that there something positive in being able to stimulate yourself using only visions created by the mind..

    • Dude, you can masturbate whenever you want. You can even watch porn whenever you want.

      The thing is, I recommend watching less porn because it’ll motivate you to go out and meet women. If you masturbate less, it’ll also motivate you equally well.

  7. I’m a woman and I am addicted to porn trying everything just to reach a clit orgasm. I’ve been watching porn since I was 9 and now I am 21. It is extremely frustrating and porn had literally ruined my life, I no longer get aroused by my own partner! I don’t get horny around anyone anymore just porn. It’s really bad. The most I have gone without watching it is 4 days (that was really hard tho). Any advice on how to stop watching it. Also porn has desentisized me too and I really need professional help I think but cannot afford it as I am studying.

  8. This is to the gal who has been masturbating since she was nine which is crazy to me that you had access to pornography at 9 years old! But what you have to start doing is practicing self-control like the 12 steps of Alcohol Anonymous one day at a time in your case, one hour at a time. Start training your mind to not give in to the sexual impulse of watching pornography. I used to watch it daily and now I’m at once a week and that’s a big comeback from 28 years of masturbating to pornography. I am working towards eliminating pornography, eliminating that visual stimulation. Which is retraining your mind. That’s where it starts. What you have to do is practice moderation. Practice moderation in all things. Foods, even exercise and definitely subjecting your mind to perverted pornography because that’s what happens, it gets even more perverted.

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